The Tram Twitcher's Guide To The Fallacy

Posted by 'Anna Thema', Edinburgh Evening News online comments 15/02/10.

Deep below the Royal Mile, two councilors have programmed their supercomputer to find a solution to the tram project's onging schedule and budget problems.

Topdeck: Oh great computer, have you an answer for us?

Cheap Thought: AN ANSWER? AN ANSWER TO WHAT?

Tramfondle: An answer to the problem we gave you.

Cheap Thought: YES, I HAVE AN ANSWER.

Topdeck: You mean there is an answer? A simple answer?

Tramfondle: To Trams, the Business Case and Scheduling?

Cheap Thought: YES, THERE IS.

Tramfondle: Brilliant!

Topdeck: We're saved!

Cheap Thought: ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT.

Topdeck: That doesn't matter. Tell us.

Cheap Thought: I REALLY DON'T THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT.

Tramfondle: Tell us anyway... Please!

Cheap Thought: ALRIGHT. THE ANSWER TO TRAMS, THE BUSINESS CASE AND SCHEDULING IS...

Topdeck: Yes?

Tramfondle: Yes???

Cheap Thought: TWENTY-TWO!

Topdeck: Twenty-two?

Cheap Thought: IT WAS A SIMPLE CALCULATION...

Tramfondle: What do you mean, twenty-two?

Cheap Thought: IT IS THE BEST SOLUTION. THE ONE PEOPLE WANT.

Tramfondle: Wait a minute...

Topdeck: You mean we should keep the bus service that the trams will replace?

Cheap Thought: YES.

Tramfondle: *groans* The taxpayers are going to kill us!