... To the Emirates.
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Sunday, 28 February 2010
Wednesday, 17 February 2010
Monday, 15 February 2010
The Tram Twitcher's Guide To The Fallacy
Posted by dcwarden on 18:35
Posted by 'Anna Thema', Edinburgh Evening News online comments 15/02/10.
Deep below the Royal Mile, two councilors have programmed their supercomputer to find a solution to the tram project's onging schedule and budget problems.
Topdeck: Oh great computer, have you an answer for us?
Cheap Thought: AN ANSWER? AN ANSWER TO WHAT?
Tramfondle: An answer to the problem we gave you.
Cheap Thought: YES, I HAVE AN ANSWER.
Topdeck: You mean there is an answer? A simple answer?
Tramfondle: To Trams, the Business Case and Scheduling?
Cheap Thought: YES, THERE IS.
Tramfondle: Brilliant!
Topdeck: We're saved!
Cheap Thought: ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT.
Topdeck: That doesn't matter. Tell us.
Cheap Thought: I REALLY DON'T THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT.
Tramfondle: Tell us anyway... Please!
Cheap Thought: ALRIGHT. THE ANSWER TO TRAMS, THE BUSINESS CASE AND SCHEDULING IS...
Topdeck: Yes?
Tramfondle: Yes???
Cheap Thought: TWENTY-TWO!
Topdeck: Twenty-two?
Cheap Thought: IT WAS A SIMPLE CALCULATION...
Tramfondle: What do you mean, twenty-two?
Cheap Thought: IT IS THE BEST SOLUTION. THE ONE PEOPLE WANT.
Tramfondle: Wait a minute...
Topdeck: You mean we should keep the bus service that the trams will replace?
Cheap Thought: YES.
Tramfondle: *groans* The taxpayers are going to kill us!
Deep below the Royal Mile, two councilors have programmed their supercomputer to find a solution to the tram project's onging schedule and budget problems.
Topdeck: Oh great computer, have you an answer for us?
Cheap Thought: AN ANSWER? AN ANSWER TO WHAT?
Tramfondle: An answer to the problem we gave you.
Cheap Thought: YES, I HAVE AN ANSWER.
Topdeck: You mean there is an answer? A simple answer?
Tramfondle: To Trams, the Business Case and Scheduling?
Cheap Thought: YES, THERE IS.
Tramfondle: Brilliant!
Topdeck: We're saved!
Cheap Thought: ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT.
Topdeck: That doesn't matter. Tell us.
Cheap Thought: I REALLY DON'T THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LIKE IT.
Tramfondle: Tell us anyway... Please!
Cheap Thought: ALRIGHT. THE ANSWER TO TRAMS, THE BUSINESS CASE AND SCHEDULING IS...
Topdeck: Yes?
Tramfondle: Yes???
Cheap Thought: TWENTY-TWO!
Topdeck: Twenty-two?
Cheap Thought: IT WAS A SIMPLE CALCULATION...
Tramfondle: What do you mean, twenty-two?
Cheap Thought: IT IS THE BEST SOLUTION. THE ONE PEOPLE WANT.
Tramfondle: Wait a minute...
Topdeck: You mean we should keep the bus service that the trams will replace?
Cheap Thought: YES.
Tramfondle: *groans* The taxpayers are going to kill us!
Sunday, 14 February 2010
Snozzberries?
Posted by dcwarden on 21:18
You may be aware that Sky are using Gene Wilder (in Willy Wonka guise) to plug their 'Supertelly' HD offerings. Now I have always found Mel Stuart's 1971 adaptation of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory a little creepy (if not as grim as Tim Burtons') but there's no doubt Pure Imagination has a magical, other-worldly quality to it. As with every iconic song, there are no shortage of folks willing to try and do something with it (Maroon 5 have even had a predictably careful bash) but one that really sticks out is by Californian weirdo-virtuoso Buckethead. His adaptation of Bricusse and Newley's song, characteristically re-monikered 'Wonka In The Slaughter Zone', is both interesting and restrained in equal measure.
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
3's A Crowd
Posted by dcwarden on 00:06
What music defines Obama's America? Goodness only knows. Miley Cyrus? I'd like to think that were we living in the Age of Paul (and good grief I wish we were) then the musical quality barometer could be shifted up a few notches, but alas 'twas not to be. But rather than get entrapped further into the sludge of that depressing thought, let's turn our thoughts back to a simpler time. The 80s. Reagan is in power, America is winning (and Russia knows it, defeat having been foreshadowed by Stallone) and the Progmasters of the Universe have embraced AOR in a big, some say cynical, way. The Korg M1 has just been released, and the Japanese techno-magic of MIDI promises to bring with it the next revolution in recorded music. What a wonderful time to be a subscriber to Keyboard Player magazine.
Of course, by 1988 Reagan was on his last Presidential legs, the great ivory ticklers of the 70s started to miss their Moogs and Arista, Geffen et al once again had their heads turned by the louder, more simplistic (ie stupider) and infinitely less good music coming out of the underground scene (for grunge, read punk). Their loss was our loss. For what it is worth, here's 3.
Music, well and truly, by numbers.
Of course, by 1988 Reagan was on his last Presidential legs, the great ivory ticklers of the 70s started to miss their Moogs and Arista, Geffen et al once again had their heads turned by the louder, more simplistic (ie stupider) and infinitely less good music coming out of the underground scene (for grunge, read punk). Their loss was our loss. For what it is worth, here's 3.
Music, well and truly, by numbers.
Wednesday, 3 February 2010
Blunder Road
Posted by dcwarden on 01:28
Edinburgh, my birthplace and the place I called home until very recently, has made some almighty blunders in its time. And if you didn't bother to click on the link as you were sure it would just take you to the Edinburgh Trams propaganda site, you're wrong. There's no way NOMW is giving that abomination of a scheme the oxygen of publicity, adverse or not. You may not be aware that the 'City Fathers' almost bankrupted the place centuries before trams though, when despite the fact the Firth of Forth is topographically completely unsuitable as a major shipping channel, they spent the equivalent of billions of pounds trying to dredge large parts of it and turn Leith into the main port of a Clyde-beating waterway. Maybe the current lot are just trying to finish what their hapless predecessors started.
For all that though, there's to be no out-stupidifying Dubai. Recession or no recession, Dubai's a place that still likes to do things bigger and better than anyone else (they're-whisper it- building a tram line to complement their grossly over-budget and under-utilised monorail network as I write) and so it should come as no surprise that they've now managed to build a tunnel without telling anyone about it. Not only that, they've forgotten they even did it. Brilliant.
Tuesday, 2 February 2010
Mothers of the World (well, Lincolnshire) Unite!
Posted by dcwarden on 11:31
So, what do you think really upsets the mothers of Lincolnshire; the ongoing, seemingly irreconcilable conflict in Afganistan? The botched global response to natural disasters? The increasing inequality gap between Britain's rich and poor? Of course not, silly- It's people leaving dirty clothes next to the washing basket. This bombshell came from a survey on a website which my favourite local newspaper, the Lincolnshire Echo, cut-and-pasted into their paper today. I think I can say that with confidence as there is no way nos. 5 and 17 on the list would ever have passed a sub editor's desk. Woops.
Oh, and number 49, wonky rug? Wonky rug? No idea.
Oh, and number 49, wonky rug? Wonky rug? No idea.
